% Understanding Engineers
% src Maria from 'net, folklore...
% part of Volker's preamble 
% JC 14 October 1999

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\begin{document}

\begin{itemize}

\item Comprehending Engineers - Take One

Two male engineering students were walking across campus when one
said, ``Where did you get such a great bike?'' The second engineer
replied, ``Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business
when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the
ground, took off all her clothes and said, ``Take what you want.''''
The second engineer nodded approvingly, ``Good choice; the clothes
probably wouldn't have fit.''


\item Comprehending Engineers - Take Two

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was
better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said
he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an
enduring relationship.  The artist said he enjoyed time with his
mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.  The
engineer said, ``I like both.'' ``Both?''  Engineer: ``Yeah. If you
have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending
time with the other woman, and you can go to the plant and get some
work done.''


\item Comprehending Engineers - Take Three

What's the difference between Engineers and Architects?  \newline
Engineers build weapons, Architects build targets.


\item Comprehending Engineers - Take Four

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass
is half empty.  To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs
to be.


\item Comprehending Engineers - Take Five
``An Engineer and His Frog''

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him
and said, ``If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess.'' He
bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.  The frog
spoke up again and said, ``If you kiss me and turn me back into a
beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week.'' The engineer
took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the
pocket.  The frog then cried out, ``If you kiss me and turn me back
into a princess, I'll stay with you and do \emph{anything} you want.''
Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back
into his pocket.  Finally, the frog asked, ``What is the matter?  I've
told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week
and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?'' The engineer
said,``Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a
talking frog, now that's cool.''

\end{itemize}


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